Hey Reader,

I'm sorry I ghosted you.

Lots of stuff has happened, so I took a break from being online.

But I didn't tell you the full story.

So here it is:

My mum was with her partner, Rich, for 20 years.

He was a wonderful man, and I considered him my dad.

But a call from my mum soon changed that.

"We've got some bad news, I'm afraid. Rich has been diagnosed with lung cancer. And he has brain tumours."

It felt like déjà vu.

My mum was diagnosed with ovarian cancer 18 months ago. (She's all clear now.)

So Rich's diagnosis felt like a death blow.

We hugged it out on the call.

His deterioration was rapid.

One minute, we were playing cards.

Five weeks later, he was bed-bound.

Palliative nurses visited twice a day. Sh*tloads of drugs passed through his body.

He was barely eating.

Barely drinking.

The last time I saw him, I'm not sure he recognised me.

Speaking at his funeral was the hardest thing I've ever done.

Honestly?

The whole thing was a blur.

I remember choking a few times and seeing tears in the crowd. So many people loved this man. I loved this man.

And now he's gone.

I coughed and spluttered my way through 2024.

Rich passed away.

My biological dad also passed away.

I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years.

I lost a major client.

I let go of The Committed Writers Club.

I was involved in a car crash.

I stopped writing on Medium.

I stopped going to the gym.

I stopped caring.

But it wasn't all bad.

I bought my first property.

My best friend got married.

I started a new job.

I started working wit Kit.

I'm in a happy relationship again.

Let's just say the last 12 months have been an emotional sh*tshow.

And my heart wasn't in this.

Slowly but surely, the well is filling again. I'm feeling the urge to publish online.

My reasons for doing so have shifted.

In 2020, writing was therapy.

In 2021, writing was my hobby.

In 2022, writing was my obsession.

And for the last couple of years, writing was my job.

Now?

I'm not sure what my relationship with writing is.

I guess I'm still figuring that out.

Maybe it's just a tool to help me think clearly.

Maybe it's something else.

Who the f*ck knows.

So what does this mean for you?

I want to start I'm going to start sending emails to you once every 2 weeks again.

What about is anyone's guess.

They'll probably be about creating opportunities online, like working with Kit.

But this could change.

If this isn't for you, please unsubscribe.

I won't check. And I won't be offended.

So clearly this isn't the most profound or elegant email I've ever sent you — but it might be the most important.

It's got me typing again.

And after 4 months away, it feels good to back.

Thanks for sticking with me. It means more than you know.

See you again in 2 weeks time,

Scott

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